This one is dedicated to my ladies, without whom I wouldn't survive most days.
I read a quote earlier which read, "the only rose without thorns is friendship." My immediate thoughts? What a load of crap.
Deep, real friendships? They require work. They require forgiveness. They require sacrifice. And while I've had a friend who has stood by my side the last 16 years, it's only been within the last 5 or 6 that I've truly found a group of ladies that I feel like I'll continue to laugh and learn with for many years to come.
Mandey's been one of my best friends since high school and out of all my friends, is the one I've been through the most $h!t with. We've both stood together on mountaintops and trudged through the trenches, our friendship now stronger because of it.
Kayla came into my life unexpectedly, while on a date with one of my best guy friends. From that, an unexpected friendship blossomed. In the 6 years we've know one another, we've stood side by side through triumph and tragedy.
Tricia (and her husband Derek) went to school with my husband. When they moved into our neighborhood 5 years ago, our lives quickly intertwined and an incredible friendship began to grow. She's the gal I can always count on for an impromptu karaoke session and man, can she sing!
Lisa and I have crossed paths several times in our lives. From working in the same building (her at the bank and me at Subway) to our kids growing up together, it's been shared friendships and the last few years that have truly brought us together.
Ashley first came into my life as a friend of a friend and I'll be honest, I didn't know how to read her at first. But now, I'm grateful for the work we've both put in to get where we are today. And while I know I'm from the South, I swear this girl was too in a past life! She's sassy and I love it!
We're loud. We act crazy together. For example, a recent excursion to a Wichita Target which if witnessed on any security footage will have people thinking "she gone" when in all actuality, not a drop of alcohol had been consumed that day.
We laugh, A LOT. Nothing compares to the stomachache I get after laughing with them. We have inside jokes; hey Mandey - remember that time we planted an already dead plant just so we didn't dispose of it in front of Jacob?
We converse almost daily, and across several platforms, about anything and everything. We talk about rough days at work and workout plans. We talk about books and movies and TV shows, about future plans and vacation. We're also all very strong willed and independent, which can mean that our opinions are not always the same. And yet, this often leads to deeper conversations and changing perspectives.
We've cried together, multiple times. Because....life. We can be honest with each other when we're struggling.
Our friendship doesn't pressure. It's an open invitation to be authentically you, whatever that may look like. We know each other's weakness, and strive to focus to each other's strengths.
Our friendship isn't made up of a bunch of big things, but more so, a bunch of little ones. It's full of:
- text conversations constructed of only GIFs
- porch beers on random nights
- play dates
- a girls night in complete with adult lunchables, wine and laughter (or watching Steel Magnolias because a certain person, AHEM..Kayla, hadn't seen it yet)
- cheering each other on in whatever things we are doing
Let's face it, with everything going on in the world today, we need each other, even on days we don't want to admit it.
And whether or not we want to admit it, we're not perfect, not a single one of us. We've hurt each other's feelings a time or two. We've called each other on our crap. In the moment it may have burned and felt raw, but it's also lead us down a path of understanding. It's allowed us to grow, to strengthen our bond.
These ladies have taught me that we don't need to try so hard. We don't always have to look put together or have our ducks in a row. Let's face it, my ducks are almost indefinitely NOT in a row. They've helped me to find the balance between being there for others but knowing that I also need to show up for myself.
Choose the friends who are choosing you. Love the friends that love you. And tell them, shout it from the damn rooftop. Because fierce lady friendships, they're hard to beat.
Another beautiful thing? There's always room for more, in both our horseshoe (because as Glennon Doyle says, "leave space, always leave space") and our hearts.
